Welcome to Indoctrination 👁️

Are you one of us?

A newsletter on upcoming food and beverage trends that offers a curation of brands and aesthetics written by Andrea Hernández.

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Welcome to Our Eden

Greetings from your beloved, non-controversial, cult leader, we are gathered here today to welcome a new batch of snaxers, across platforms we inch closer to 13K from all different corners of the world, who have willingly chosen to partake of our offered cup, curation as salvation. For almost a year now, I have shepherded you across seas of sameness, saturated shelves, aisles that extend beyond your tired eyes could see, through platforms that offer you thousands of options only to leech off your limited attention spans for-profit, shield you from over-inflated hype and break you free from the constant circle jerk of VCs shoving their portfolio companies down your throat while regurgitating “disclaimer I’m an investor” ad infinitum.

Snaxshot was born out of the need for a much-needed reset, a pushback. It became a safe space for us to have these honest conversations around what feels gimmicky, predatory, advocating for more consumer education. The snaxboi persona is based on “fuckboi meets Erewhon” and I wanted to make sure that no one felt like they would be shunned for asking questions like:

Why am I being sold on these trends at a premium? When did food and beverage become the latest external signalers? What the fuck is an adaptogen and why is it in my coffee now? Why the hell is water labeled as vegan now, thanks for letting me know I’m not sipping canned broth?

Snaxshot was created with utility-first in mind, how do we unpack these trends, and gain a better understanding of what is driving them in a way that aids both brands and consumers alike? We aimed to level the playing field and remove any unnecessary friction between these two, think of us as an intermediary of sorts. With the promise of a more equal landscape, the appeal of Snaxshot slowly seeped into the Kool Aid, and it has also served as a beacon for places outside the usual hubs, we became less of a destination, and we have achieved “a vibe” —we are the underdogs, who indulge in playful rebelliousness but at the same time lead conversations that aim to parse through the constant noise and BS in this industry.

We have spent the past year building our foundations for what comes next, I always considered this the anti-scale —we wanted the right people to come to us, so we worked hard to focus on producing great content every time, that would share itself and dissipate amongst the right people, slowly but surely, we have lured an entire industry to take on an outsider perspective. And it has all been for you, yeah you. There is much to come for Snaxshot, but before we let you in on this, it’s time for indoctrination. The chants are starting, and the candles are being lit, can you hear them?

Before we baptize you in adaptogenic waters and take communion in the form of THC crackers, let us introduce you to our indoctrination sponsor.

In accordance with our scriptures on “utility first”Tydo helps DTC brands like Recess and Judy organize their data to make better, and more informed decisions. Their miracles spread far and wide, along with the prophet Nik Sharma, they brought to life Report Cards, a free tool that sends you automated snapshots of your brand’s performance every morning. The best part? No code or data analyst required. Miraculously you can get started for free, and see why brands like Disco, Maev and Barcode are all using Tydo.

Congregation Based on Curation

Nothing is as sacred to your cult leader as being able to commune together with brands that have formed part of Snaxshot for so long, it is why we have invited a few of our favorite apostles, from many corners of our snaxverse, let us introduce you who we will be partaking with:

Tempo: One of the first brands we featured when we started, these apostles hail from Los Angeles, California, they believe that low dose & low cost are keys to the savory snack category & critical to expanding cannabis adoption, we are honored to be able to partake in these elevated treats.

Toodaloo: These apostles are proud to offer the best trail mixes in comparison to others out there, based in Austin, we are honored to have the ability to commune together on their adaptogenic mixes.

Ruby: Visiting us from a very remote corner of the Rubyverse, these apostles come bearing the message of tartness which we are happy to indulge in, we are delighted to have our cup runneth over with hibiscus beverages that honor a tart palate.

Dada Daily: These apostles live within surrealism and we are elated to have their dadaist snacks that remind us of the beauty, artistic and fun experience that snacking should be about, an outer-worldly experience.

Half Past: The time for the premium seltzer is now, or so preaches the Half Past apostles, hailing from Chicago but quickly expanding their sect. We are happy to partake in this occasion and any other after.

No & Low: These apostles are putting a lot of work trying to undo pervasive indoctrination regarding alcoholic beverages as well as toxic drink culture we are so happy to have them be part of our communion. They have brought along some Norweigan friends, for us to get acquainted with.

Empress: Based in Norway, these apostles are known for these better booch bottles that please the eye as well as the tongue. We have the ability to sip on these thanks to our friends at No & Low.

Foxtrot Market: One of our many deities, we are beyond honored to have CaaS Daddy in spirit and in snacks, so that we can become one, “Take and eat these chips, this is my body, which is given up, for you.”

Wunderground: This sect preaches better caffeine in the form of mushroom coffee, with an ode to the playfulness and creativity of nostalgic snacks.

Alec’s Ice Cream: Made in Petaluma, these apostle brothers believe in better ice cream that involves ice cream as a fresh take on the French custard-style – with the least amount of ingredients for the maximum amount of flavor.

Ranch Rider: Hailing all the way from Austin, these apostles have been in search of better for you options when it comes to hard seltzers, they have quickly expanded their following and we are excited to be able to bathe in their ranch waters.

Gigantic: One of our most loyal apostles, giving us a better way to indulge in sweets, can’t wait to take gigantic bites of their chocolate snacks.

Peak: Visiting us all the way from the UK, these apostles practice a more enlightened way to entertain, through their social tonic, that contains a combination of nootropics and adaptogens. We are delighted to commune with them for the first time in US soil.

Cuna de Piedra: These “apóstoles” are based in Monterrey, Mexico and guard the ancient practice of cacao elaboration that dates back to 4,000 years. We are honored to be able to commune and partake in such ethical chocolate bars that bring necessary tribute to its roots.

Aplós: These apostles have concocted a non-alcoholic spirit with 20 mg of broad-spectrum hemp to “calm and uplift without the negative effects of alcohol” while serving you luxe aesthetics. Happy to offer their elixir to our congregation.

So Gay Rose: These apostles are reclaiming the phrase “So Gay” to be “So Great,” allowing us to embrace the joy that comes from living our most authentic, colorful self. We thank them for allowing us to see through their rosé colored glasses.

BTR BAR: This sect preaches that snacks should have a greater function and purpose, as well as the promise of better ingredients, we are happy to power our congregation with their mindful creations.

Welcome to the international cult of snax, we are gathered to receive, may you go forth and be merry with this gift bestowed upon you, that you may never again suffer through excess as you walk through the aisles of Whole Foods.

May it be. Let the church say fuck yeah.

Spoonful of News 🥄

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