Snaxshot #31: Food in 2025 🌌

let's do the time warp again! 🚀

A newsletter on upcoming food and beverage trends that offers a curation of brands and aesthetics written by Andrea Hernández.

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Ground Control to Major Tom
Take your protein pills and put your helmet on
Ground Control to Major Tom (ten, nine, eight, seven, six)
Commencing countdown, engines on (five, four, three)
Check ignition and may God's love be with you (two, one, liftoff)

— Space Oddity, David Bowie

New Refutation of Time 🕰️

The paradox of life can be summed up as projecting finitude into infinity, as Borges believed, time does not exist in succession, but eternity is lived in each moment. You might be wondering, what the fuck does this have to do with food Andrea? My point being that as the year comes to an end, I’ve decided to think less about how 2022 might look like, but have taken upon myself the liberty of jumping ahead to 2025 —after all, isn’t time just a compilation of illusory acts?

We already have Virgin Galactic testing out commercial flights to space, the Tesla of food, companies growing exotic alt-meat, vodka made from air, edible sunscreen, and the world’s first regulatory approval of commercial cultured meat in the year 2021 — how much can that possibly change halfway through the decade? Let’s explore, shall we?

Don’t be afraid, time warping is easy. See?

Welcome to the year 2025.

Shape Shifter Foods ◻️

Oh hi there snaxer, you must be famished, traveling 4 years into the future and what not. What’s on the menu you ask? Well in 2025, food has taken on different shapes and forms —beverages have taken upon themselves to reduce waste by taking on tablet forms, who needs salad bowls when you can have a literal salad bar, you can easily make ice cream in a blender, and entire meals now come packed in one single square and instant frozen coffee is helping us save money and the environment.

Mushrooms in Mars? 🍄

Mars ain't the kind of place to raise your kids
In fact it's cold as hell
And there's no one there to raise them
If you did

— Rocket Man, Elton John

We haven’t been able to use mushrooms to terraform in Mars (yet) but we have used the fungus among us for everything from helping us adapt to stressors caused by the impending doom of climate change, coffee roasters pivoting to mushroom powders and chagaccinos, mycelium packaging to reduce waste and its properties have also allowed for us to create tastier, more flavorful alternatives that can better simulate the texture of protein, not to mention psilocybin therapy is helping us treat our minds and emotional states. As we have reached more regulatory approval of magic mushrooms, we can now micro dose in the form of tasty snacks.

Food For Every Mood 🧠

Can’t be more on the nose with retro futurism than the resurgence of food as medicine, there are now stores that dub themselves “modern pharmacies” but instead of pharmaceuticals they carry food and beverage brands that are catering to complement different emotional states, in a less invasive way. Studies have long shown that food can help regulate mood, these brands are taking it a step further by offering it in a convenient format, whether it’s a canned beverage or as an indulgent pint, or … orgasm inducing chocolate?

Gen Alpha Ends, Enter The Beta 👶

By 2025, the last of generation Alpha will have been born, split in between Gen X and Millennial parents. Leading into a new era, the age of the Betas —born from Millennials and GenZ parents, along with Alphas, born into a world where URL is blurred in with IRL existence, babies doing product unboxing is thing now.

**Attention parents if you do not want your future offspring to be forever scarred by being dubbed a beta, you have exactly 4 more years to produce an alpha, PSA over. ***

Betas are welcomed with the prospect of alternative breast milk, plant based alternatives, kelp, seaweed and cricket snacks as we scramble to slow down climate change.

Welcome to New Age Escapism 👨‍🚀

Ticket to the moon
Ticket to the moon
Ticket to the moon

Fly, fly through a troubled sky
Up to a new world shining bright, oh oh

— Ticket to the Moon, Electric Light Orchestra

In 2025, we ask for our products to “fuck us up fam” but in good measure, from natural wines, to low abv gins and THC drinks, new age escapism is here to stay, with beer sales declining, bottled wine losing to canned wine, a surge in interest in cannabis drinks as regulatory approval spreads. We want happy hour to remain actually happy without having to succumb to the detriment of what comes next.

Climate Change Catering 🌐

Pulling the emergency break is necessary as we have reached irreversible damage to our planet and it is not looking good in 2025, hence the need to search for ways to produce coffee without coffee beans and chocolate without cacao beans. Kelp is king as their products are carbon negative, regenerative agriculture is imperative and upcycled snacks and climate positive alcohol have become mainstream.

Now Playing: Planet of the Alts 🤖

Millennials and GenZ alike can rejoice, by 2025 you may be actually able to indulge in stretchy, vegan cheese, something that has not yet happened in the year 2021, and is what keeps most flexitarians from dropping their cheese consumption all together. You may also be finally able to indulge in lab-to-farm dining, something that is also not possible yet in 2021 as the majority of the cultivated alternatives are still having to use other alternatives like pea protein and other plant-based ingredients to hold together.

As Mother Jones eloquently reported, in 2021 we are still a few years away from being able to experience fully cultivated alternatives.

Deliver Us From Dining 🛵

Images of broken light which dance before me like a million eyes
They call me on and on across the universe
Thoughts meander like a restless wind inside a letterbox they
They tumble blindly as they make their way across the universe

— Across the Universe, The Beatles

In 2021, we saw the rising tide against tyranny of delivery apps, with cities like NYC passing laws that force delivery companies like DoorDash to share data with local restaurants, something that has been used to exploit their role as third party in the past, that led to DD and the likes to take on legal action. While that mess was happening we’ve seen the rise of more empowering apps, vertically integrated automated stores have proven convenient and cost effective, and delivery robots are a regular sight on side walks.

Mouth-Watering Metaverse 👁️

Yes, food and beverage brands started off pretty lame thinking that creating a golden digital version of their products in any way was going to appeal people into minting their NFTs but we’ve moved pass that cringe stage, by 2021 the first tokenized restaurant was opened, people can mint their recipe books and in a way crowdfund their publishing and brands who’ve legitimately established community around their products think less of perks or ways to extract from their audience, but instead, how to give true value in a world of web3. Snaxbois are copping the latest drops on their Rainbow.

  • Tokenized Restaurants

  • NFT recipes

  • Crowdfunding

Will Millennials Be Perennials? 👴🏻

You are young and life is long, and there is time to kill today
And then one day you find ten years have got behind you
No one told you when to run, you missed the starting gun

And you run, and you run to catch up with the sun but it's sinking

— Time, Pink Floyd

Ok, this might sound paradoxical considering climate change and always inches away from full blown nuclear war according to the Doomsday clock, but we are living at a time where humans are living longer, like, we can consider what it might look like to live well into the 100s — but before we go full on Metuselah, in 2025 genomics have just become mainstream and personalized nutrition has finally replaced the notion that keto and paleo are one size fits all.

We sail through endless skies
Stars shine like eyes
The black night sighs

The moon in silver trees
Falls down in tears
Light of the night

— Planet Caravan, Black Sabbath

Oracular Spectacular 🔮

Shhhh! My favorite show is on, this week on — “What’s New You Ask?”

With Time: Based in Jakarta Indonesia, beautiful pantry items from miso butter to hot sauce to shroom shoyu.

Dune: Another drink that promotes “beauty” and/or “glow”

Freezer Martini: From the makers of “Send a Negroni” and equally as cute.

Big Mood: Leave it to the Australians to constantly give us aesthetics henny.

Gonzo: The boxed wine renaissance lives on, this is equal parts funny and beautiful.

Woven: Give me all the Aesop x alcohol aesthetics, based in Scotland, looks delish!

Snax Concierge 🛎️

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